30. June 2008 by Steven.

You can click for a slightly bigger version. I just got bored and wanted to be creative so I made a lingerie calendar…what don’t most people do that in their free time.

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24. June 2008 by Matt.

-Matt makes a terrible entrance using Owen Hart’s music…bad Jew…no Bacon
-Matt attempts to be a producer…he’s still on mic
-KEGGER
-Matt fucks up the mics 35 seconds into the show…terrible producer
-Kristin’s brother took 3 gallon jugs of beer from Steven’s house
-Chris Candido died in 2005…Kevin Nash had a staph infection…CC faked a leg injury…2 minutes later gets a leg injury…Died 72 hours later from a staph infection…Wrestlin has never been more real
-Eric wishes death on Kevin Nash
-Steven saw Eric’s girlfriends BOOBS!!!! BOOBS!!!!!!
-And another girl’s BOOBS!!!! BOOBS!!!!!!!!
-Steven fears for his well being
-It was a graduation present
-Steven doesn’t remember Matt leaving the kegger…he drank for 12 hours
-Steven drank 20 out of 32 hours between Friday and Saturday
-Everyone is cool with the BOOBS!!!! BOOBS!!!!!!!
-Jason was naked - “Schlong hanging out”
-Matt is sitting in the “junk” chair
-Matt tries to move the show along…FAIL
-Felicia brought her cousin to the kegger…got naked in front of him
-Old ECW…Where Hardcore Began
-”It’s so great to watch Steve Corino’s head explode”
-”For $200 this guy would risk brain damage for me”
-TNA staff member loses his thumb, some other guy dies
-Stone Cold did it
-Koko B. Ware as a groomsman, with Frankie 2
-”I drooled all over myself because a bird died in a fire…Why wouldn’t he fly away”
-Hulk Hogan + Wrestling = Eh?
-Hulk Hogan + Wrestling + Reality Show = EH?
-Hulk Hogan + Celebrity Wrestling + Reality Show + Dustin Diamond = KICK ASS
-Butterbean should punch Screech
-Mark Paul Goessler did it right, so did Mario Lopez…to an extent
-Next week Matt won’t be allowed in the room
-Woojew the Music Volume 1 is officially available: e-mail Matt for a copy Matt@woojew.com
-Eric’s girlfriend questioned the cover where it says her name on Eric’s To Do list…seemed obvious to the boys

-”It’s either this or we play ookie cookie every time we get together.”
-Steven’s mom was surprised how talkative Matt was a blamed beer…he’d had a glass
-Obvious statement - Keg’s are heavy
-Keg’s are economical if you have 10+ people drinking
-July 4th Kegger…possible
-Superman really is dead…he fell off a horse, then ate babies on Southpark
-Wrestler Chris Benoit’s Murdered Wife NUDE!
-Vince McMahon does cocaine…all those surprised raise your hand
-Kelly Kelly pees in sinks…seriously…google it…images
-Family members should never ask you for PORN…it’s wrong and creepy
-Steven loans out porn…wanna borrow some e-mail him at steven@woojew.com
-Two Girls One Cup now you have to pay for disgusting stuff
-Matt tells a story you can barely hear…because he doesn’t have a mic…because he’s a producer…right
-Wanna see something disturbing…go to google
-Two words: Ed McMahon
-Larryking.com, the boys try and buy it…For the record, this didn’t work it is owned, not by the boys, do not ever go there
-If only there was some way for Ed McMahon to get $25,000 to stop the foreclosure on his house
-Rich People + Coke = Broke (e.g. Ed McMahon and Dustin Diamond)
-”You buy nice cars, you buy nice wives”
-”Fuck you, you dirty old jew”
-Listen to Him…listen to Who?

-Send us song suggestions, comments, ideas, etc. We will read and consider everything. We do what we do for you!

Visit http://www.kirby-author.com to download FREE copies of Steven’s novels. They are great, check them out!

You can e-mail us at eric@woojew.com, matt@woojew.com or steven@woojew.com

This week we played:

“Superman’s Dead” by Our Lady Peace
From the album,  A Decade

“I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight” by Smitty and T Payne

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20. June 2008 by Steven.

Just something quick I put together.

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15. June 2008 by Matt.

This is a collection of B-sides and rare recordings from the early days of Weezer. Think of it as Weezer Album 2.5. It’s a great record, and if you’re new to Weezer this is the perfect place to get you started!
This file is being freely distributed on the Weezer forums and I thought I’d share it here. It’s really quite spectacular. You really need to listen to the tracks in order to get the full effect. The guy who put this together added alot of cool transitions and other hidden goodies!

http://www.sendspace.com/file/pkf4uy

1. You Gave Your Love To Me Softly
2. Waiting On You
3. I Just Threw Out The Love Of My Dreams/Mrs. Young
4. Susanne
5. You Won’t Get With Me Tonight
6. Devotion
7. Velouria
8. Jamie
9. Longtime Sunshine
10. Mykel & Carli
11. Jamie (Acoustic) [Hidden Track]

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15. June 2008 by Matt.

Demons are funny things. Well not so much “funny.” More like terrifying. They can either be a simple angry spirit that hurls kitchen knives at you, or they can take the physical shape of some multi-tenticled hellspawn with six mouths and a mind that telepathically screams words and images capable of plunging you into a nightmare realm of torture. But whatever your class of demonic possession, this handy FAQ will help you deal with it.

Let’s get started!

I have awoken to a horrible sound coming from my living room.

You should probably go and investigate to see what is going on. Considering this is a booklet on demons, coming face-to-face with one is a startlingly possible scenario.

There seems to be some kind of…goat…in my living room, eating my throw pillows.

If it is simply a goat, consider calling animal control. Or simply shoo it out of your house and into the street where someone else will deal with it. I’m sure someone is looking for their goat.

It has six legs and a tail made purely of bone. I doubt this is a regular goat.

Then it is probably a demon. I fucking told you so. A goat is commonly associated with hell and demonic imagery. Booyah.

Should I still try to remove it myself?

Probably not. You have no idea what kind of powers this particular demon possesses. For all you know it’s a soul-eater.

A what?

A soul-eater. You know, feast on your immortal, holy vessel? If it manages to devour your soul, you’ll know nothing but suffering for all of eternity.

I’m kinda scared.

Odds are it isn’t a soul-eater. That is reserved for a higher class of demon. Usually something that looks more…demony.

I still don’t know what to do about the goat-thing.

Has it noticed you yet? If it hasn’t, try to get it’s attention. If you are lucky, it’s simply lost on our mortal plane, and will run back the festering womb from which it was spawned.

I hit it in the head with a coffee table book. It looks pissed.

Which coffee table book did you hit it with?

Seasons by Frans Heidrich.

Fuck, that book sucks. No wonder you only managed to make it angry.

I fail to see what my choice of book has to do with anything.

Look, just don’t sweat it. You have a couple of options here. On the one hand, you can try and fight it. If you are a particularly religious sort…

I’m not.

Then you might want to consider the other option of…

The goat has torn one of my kidneys out, and is eating it.

This means you have encountered a Gnuth T’kour. This is a special class of demon with a particular fondness for human organs. They are usually employed by Satan to eat the innards of the worst sinners. These organs grow back with each passing day, so the sinners are forced to have their own intestines eaten in front of them until the end of time. Legend has it that…

The goat has removed a large portion of my small intestine.

He’s already onto your gut? Man, you are fu…

The goat is devouring my liver.

Your last hope is to carve a pentagram on your chest and accept Satan as your lord and master. This might sway the Lord of Darkness into giving you a less demeaning eternity in hell. Like scooping up the fetid shit of the crucified, or waxing his evil Mercedes.

Satan drives a Mercedes?

Yes, yes he does.

I think I’m dead.

You can’t be dead if you are asking questions.

…

Now you are dead.

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13. June 2008 by Matt.

-Hooray for Barack Obama!
-Matt bought a 3 DVD box set about the U.S. Presidents. Dork.
-We need to stop codding our children. Let the dumb ones sit in the mud. - Matt Schlein
-Red pens hurt your feelings.
-Steven would like to be rewarded for his being a decent guy.
-It’s always sunny in North Texas!
-Matt has a broader knowledge of HTML than the guy that runs the website at Steven’s work.
-HTM-what now?
-Tonight at ten…can WooJew kill you??? LISTEN NOW…AT TEN O CLOCK!
-Kristin calls in! She’s going to Derek’s house!
-Matt’s taking a step back from active hosting duties on the show. He’ll be more of a producer.
-Eric and Steven don’t quite understand.
-Matt is the Potsie of WooJew.
-What what in the butt?
-…and that’s how cold activation works!
-The boys play 6 degree of Kevin Bacon, except without any destination in mind.
-Matt LeBlanc was in the Red Shoe Diaries.
-So was Tasha Yar!
-I’m not just sure, I’m HIV postitive!
-FAG!Send us song suggestions, comments, ideas, etc. We will read and consider everything. We do what we do for you!

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9. June 2008 by Matt.

I’ve really been on a Weezer kick since the Red Album hoopla started a few weeks back. I’ve picked up a handful of Weezer discs in the last week including:

Alone: The Home Recordings Of Rivers Cuomo

This is a neat little gem. It’s all demos and home recordings that Rivers did from 1992-2007.  Some of my favorites include the slower demo for Buddy Holly, the various “Songs From The Black Hole” demos, 1997’s Crazy One and 2004’s I Was Made For You. For a demo disc, most of these songs are surprisingly fleshed out. Along with the very detailed booklet, these songs give you a nice journey through Rivers’ musical life, and Weezer’s history.

The Good Life Austraillian EP

Apparently this one is a holy grail of Weezer singles for the hardcore fans. Kinda like any of the GLS HIM singles. I dunno, I found it on half.com for 12 bucks. Anyways this bad boy features 2 b-sides from the Pinkerton era, both of which were originally demos for “Songs From The Black Hole”. One, “I Just Threw Out The Love Of My Dreams” is the first Weezer song to be sung by someone other than Rivers. Rachel Haden from the Rentals handles the vocal duties. I love this song so much! Also included are two live acoustic songs, The Good Life and Pink Triangle, both from a performance Weezer did at a school cafeteria as part of a contest. Fantastic versions of both of these songs!

I also ordered Hash Pipe and Island In The Sun singles for a few bucks each off half.com. They both feature 3 b-sides! I also just ordered a UK copy of the Red album, that features 2 new bonus tracks. Woot!

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5. June 2008 by Matt.

http://www.damnfunnypictures.com/html/New-Jersey-Douchebags.html

For the love of everything that is (and isn’t) holy, you MUST click this link.

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4. June 2008 by Steven.

So we created cover art for Woojew The Music Volume 1 last night and I have to say I’m rather impressed. It took some time but I think it is creative and fun and really tells a lot about the show, ourselves and the project. We will be releasing after the Keg party on Friday. I will put up a copy of it on here and we will start creating some ads as well in case you want any of your friends to check out a copy.

Remember you can get your copy either at the party on Friday or by contacting Matt at matt@woojew.com. No cost to you, we will ship it directly to you, hell, we’ll even autograph it if you want.

One day it’ll be worth something, just you watch.

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1. June 2008 by Matt.

On Tuesday, Weezer releases their sixth album (and third self-titled). I’ve been able to hear the entire album for a few days now and I have to say, I’m more excited about this CD than I was the first time I heard The Blue Album. Do I feel that Red is better than Blue? Let’s find out…

When I first saw the cover I thought, “Oh hell.” Rivers Cuomo looking like a cowboy? Brian Bell looking like a chic homeless man? What are they trying to do? Then I heard the title of the first single, “Pork and Beans”. Shit, another Maladroit, I thought. For those who do not know, Maladroit was Weezer’s 2002 album. I thought, and still think, it sucks. I recently decided to listen to the album again from start to finish and I still can’t get into it. Hardcore Weezer fans love it though. Guess I’m “too mainstream”.
Then I finally heard “PnB”. Wow. My first reaction. This is the same sort of Weezer that performed 2005’s Make Believe and 2001’s Green Album.  The lyrics are unbelieveably catchy, which isn’t much of a stretch for Rivers, and the music is tight and crunchy. Yeah, poor choice of words, but when you hear the song you’ll agree. Rivers is nearing age 40, and his lyrics, as well as music have matured with him. He pokes fun at this fact in the lyrics to “PnB”. “They say I need some rogaine to put in my hair. Working out at the gym to fit my underwear. You’d hate for the kids to think you lost your cool.”  Rivers still manages to come across as that youthful, nerdy rocker that has been his trademark since 1994’s Blue Album, yet he’s grown. It’s a wonderful juxtoposition, and gives me hope that when I near 40 I’ll still be as “cool”, or not, as I am now in my 20’s.
“Pork and Beans” is a wonderful first single and I’m not alone in thinking this. As of now the track sits at the top of the Modern Rock charts. But what about the rest of the songs? Here are some of my favorites:
1. Troublemaker. A thunderous, rocking opener. Musically very similar to the guitar driven Green Album, lyrically much closer to 1996’s Pinkerton. Up till this point, Pinkerton has represented Weezer at their most mature lyrically. After the lack of commercial success of the album, Rivers scaled back on subsequent releases, but has slowly been returning to form. With the very first track of Red, he has done just that. I suspect that Troublemaker will become an anthem for rebellious high schoolers this summer, or this fall.
2. The Greatest Man That Ever Lived (Variations On A Shaker Hymn).  TGMTEL is strange, catchy, and progressive all at once. Opening with a random cheering crowd which turns into the sounds of blaring sirens you can’t help but be at least somewhat intrigued. Soon Rivers oddly country/rap sounding lyrics come in full force. It sounds very different, but very Weezer all the same. “I’m the baddest of the bad. I’m the best that you’ve ever had.”  This soon gives way to a short acoustic segment followed by a military march styled background with a choir singing, “After the havoc that I’m gonna reak, no more words will critics have to speak. “  Rivers then proclaims himself to be the greatest man that ever lived. Tongue in cheek much?
4. Heartsongs. This one is a ballad in which Rivers recalls the songs that have inspired him. It’s really a touching homage to past and present artists. Anyone who listened to music in the 1980’s and 90’s will feel a bit nostalgic along with Rivers. My favorite part is the buildup bridge in which Rivers recalls the first time he heard a copy of Nirvana’s Nevermind. This buildup continues into a rousing final verse that culminates with Weezer playing their own shows and their own “heartsongs”. A lot of Weezer fans do not like this song, but I think it’s a lovely addition to Red.
6. Dreamin’. Dreamin’ is the closest track here to a Blue Album song. In fact, if this song turned out to be something that was originally written for Blue, I would not be surprised. The slow breakdown duet between Brian Bell and Rivers is something new for a Weezer song, and very much welcomed. Dreamin’ reminds me a bit of some of the classic Lennon-McCartney partnerships.
7. Thought I Knew. TIK is Brian Bell’s song. This is the first time on a Weezer album proper that someone other than Rivers has sung a track. Bell is more than up to the task. This one has a very upbeat, techno feel and serves as a bridge between the primary Rivers’ tracks and those sung by the other memebers of Weezer that fill up the second half of the album.
8. Cold Dark World is Scott Shriner’s first track on the album. Co-written by Shriner and Rivers, this is a slower brooding track. There is a definite anger streak throughout the song. Reminds me of alot of the Finnish stuff I listen to. I don’t think I could see Rivers singing it. Shriner is suprisingly good on the mic, I wouldn’t mind future songs with him taking on the lead vocals.
Bonus Tracks:
11. Miss Sweeney. Pinkerton 2008. That’s the best way to describe this one. The verses are Rivers talking to Miss Sweeney in an office setting, giving her directions and such. The choruses are where Rivers breaks down and confesses his love for Miss Sweeney. After the first chorus he initially renegs, but by the second one he goes into full force just gushing the love he feels for this woman. Fantastic track that should have been on the album proper.
12. Pig. Pig is a sad ballad about a pig. Yes, a real pig. “This song details the life of a pig including playing in the mud as a piglet, falling in love, getting married, raising children and eventually being slaughtered.” It’s very touching, actually.
14. King. This is Scott Shriner’s second solo track and a kick ass one at that. The song starts out acoustically with Shriner warning and outsider at his “disco” that he is king in this town. The outsider is drunk and hitting on women. Shriner is basically protecting his kool-aid. The song revolves around Shriner letting this guy know that he is in charge around here and that if he wants to be left alone then he needs to back off. The song reaches a melodic crecsendo where the full band’s instruments kick in,
“You see I own this town
you best not come around
if you wanna get by then cool it down
if you wanna start something
know one thing: i’m king.”
King is definatly a different kind of Weezer than we’re used to, but it’s good. Shriner needs to write and sing more!

So, what do I think about The Red Album? It’s King. I would easily rank it up with Blue and Pinkerton. It has a few tracks that I’m just not entirely into, although they may grow on me.  Red is definetly off to a better start with me than Maladroit or even Make Believe. Don’t get me wrong, I like MB, but the last half of that album doesn’t do it for me. Red is an album that I can listen to from start to finish. I highly recommend it to anyone reading this. It’s that good. Get the Deluxe edition with the 4 bonus tracks if you can, because those are some of the highlights of this strange, delicious trip.  My overall rating? A-

My Weezer album rankings:
1. The Blue Album A
2. Pinkerton A
3. The Red Album A-
4. The Green Album B
5. Make Believe B-
6. Maladroit D

Want to get ahold of the standard album for cheap? Circuit City has it for $5.99 this week (in stores and online)! 6 bucks for an amazing album, you can’t pass that up! http://entertainment.circuitcity.com/Music/Album.aspx?prodid=GEFB001113502.2&store=Movies&si=ccity-prod&channel=b2c&partner=cc&catOid=-13219

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